~Smiles~

My Friends Are AWESOME!!!

welcome to my life

April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 October 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 June 2008 October 2008 February 2009 January 2010 February 2010 May 2010 June 2010 December 2010 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 May 2012 June 2012 August 2012 December 2012 March 2013 December 2013 January 2014 April 2014 November 2014 March 2015

“It hurts to let go. Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold on to something or someone the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. It confuses you, because you think that your feelings were wrong and it makes you feel so small because it’s so hard to keep it inside when you let it out and it doesn’t come back. You’re left so alone that you can’t explain. Damn, there’s nothing like that, is there? I’ve been there and you have too. You’re nodding your head.” — Henry Rollins

It's been a hell of a crazy week, and it feels like I am a complete wreck.
I feel like I need some closure. But I am grateful for the people who spent time with me and making sure that I was alright. So so grateful.




Haven't eaten anything today, and now I can't seem to sleep again.

I hurt. I keep wondering what is it that I have done. I can't seem to grab a hold on myself.

To know that this is ending is hard.
I try to be normal, pretending that everything will turn out fine.

But who am I kidding. You know yourself how it always ends. You've seen it since you were a kid.
And I am scared. Terrified.

And there's nothing I can do about it.




I wish i am a better person
It always seem like I just keep making the people around me sad, angry, annoyed.

I don't know what to do though. I can't seem do to anything right. Ever.
Sigh